JR's Diary - June 2023

6/28/23

5 hours of sleep so far, good right? Haha. Hoping to get a few more in. But I think this is why I feel awful. Its difficult for me to sleep through the entire night. Why is my peak time cat o'clock?

I want to write less whiny things, more optomistic or excited things but would that be honest?

I feel I am always late to things. It makes me sad. I discover a cool site, its been defunct for years. No one to talk to about it. Soon it won't work anymore. I find a video that is cool. Its years old. I fail to be relevant. It feels like I am on an island by myself.

I am looking at some vegan cookbooks. I doubt I will go full vegan but I want to reduce my meat intake. Its pricey.

This video is about weird games. Just wanted to share it. Its not old!

International Zine Month 2023 is coming...

6/27/23

Annnd I'm already tired. I'm wondering about my spending. I want a bike, new bathing suit and a mildly fancy pen. The bike is the thing I'm most picky/unknown about. I haven't really biked much due to balance/vertigo issues. There are adult tricycles now. They are pricey and I wonder if I can get good use out of it. The bathing suit is more settled. A bit pricey... should I go cheaper? But I like the brand, the clothes are good quality.

I was craving junk, a shower helped. I don't know why I feel so shitty so fast.


6/26/23

A new day, going to the beach really rejuvenated me. I'm looking at bathing suits. I haven't had one in a decade. I'd like to live by the sea one day.
My head hurts.

6/25/23

I am watching Reconguista in G, an older kind of forgotten Gundam series. So far its so visually interesting and there is a lot of attention of various movements of machines. It sort of hits me how stiff modern anime can be. Its a weird mix if organic drawings and some okish CGI. No clue if I will enjoy the plot though.

I went to the beach! I walked around it, sat a lot and watched the waves and absorbed the breeze. I didn't get to swim, no swimsuit. Maybe next time.


6/24/23

Love this so much. I am not a witch persay but I love how thoughtful Trey is and how critical they are of applying narratives to reality. Or shitting on Ghosthunters.

I found some webrings that are cool: The Transmasculine Pride Ring and nu-cyberspace

6/23/23 - Happy Friyay. I had a strange dream about being locked in at work, only it was more like a mall than my actual office job. It was surreal and unnerving but at the same time the kind of dream I like remembering. I think I was looking for my spouse.
Actually I do have quite a few dreams where I'm stuck or lost in a parking lot. And there were some elements of this in last night's dream, once I escaped the weird mall maze.

6/20/23 - I think I am burnt out. Life feels like it is moving too fast.

6/20/23 - I want to sleep. I am tired. But honestly I have slept a lot lately. It will be ok.

6/19/23 - As an unsocial person I think a lot about the importance of community yet all the compromises you have to make. I don't have any epic conclusions. What is interesting is that I'm not the only person that sucks at it. How to suck less at it? I keep looking and a lot of it boils down to be extroverted or pretend to be extroverted. Yikes.

6/19/23 - I want a penpal. But like a friend one. It seems like most of the ones I find are actually personal ads.

6/19/23 - I read a really good book. Now I don't know what to do with my life.

6/15/23 - My head hurts.