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I haven't been around much as I am in an anxious mood and I don't want to be too negative here.

I hope I feel better soon?

I have lately been thinking about being myself for real. I've been following the @actuallyautistic tag on Mastodon and its really been making me think about how I split myself up and how it makes me miserable. In some ways how I am so unhappy with my life even though I am so blessed. Fundamentally I want to connect to and help people outside of my family. But its been really hard. It gets to me more than I think I am allowed to be.

Another thing is the way I don't really comment on stuff. For example on being yellow/brown. I'm too used to it being off putting. Too much. That said I think I am going to make a web garden on a bigger hosting service. Neocities is a little too limited for what I really want to do on that end.

I keep thinking lots of interesting and deep thoughts. Only for my mind to go blank in front of the monitor. Its frustrating.

Another zine event is upon us. ZineWriMo this time. I pettered out during Zinetober, which technically is still going on but I quit mostly. Oh, but I did make one zine today. That's cool, right?

Sometimes it feels like such a struggle to create so I sit on Mastodon and waste some time.

On the linux front, I think I am chickening out. I spend the better part of this week working on a bootable drive. And it works, kind of? I was able to use it, but it was such a pain to use with my touchpad. Linux didn't like the touchpad and I couldn't get things to a proper size. It was all approx size 2 font.

Wow, that is actually a bit!